The mind is a powerful thing. More than any outside circumstances, your mind is the reason you make questionable money decisions (but it’s okay, we all do it!).
A client said recently, “I would give up all of the money I am making this year if I could make things right with my daughter.” She noticed that when her business thrived, her relationship with her teenage daughter would start to fall apart, and vice versa. Could our thoughts really manifest our financial reality? Lemme think….YES! Because why couldn’t my client imagine a scenario where she had a successful business AND a happy, well-connected family? In a word, brain-wiring (ok, that might be two words).
Is your brain taking you to a destination where you don’t want to be? Once you know what the most common tricks your brain plays on you, then you can take back control.Is your brain taking you to a destination where you don’t want to be? Once you know what the most common tricks your brain plays on you, then you can take back control. Click To Tweet
The 6 most common money blocks
Universal Negotiation. That’s what my client was doing—taking two completely separate issues in her life and connecting them. This would be like me saying, “I will give up all of the Cheese Nips in the world if I could save the tigers.” One thing MIGHT have something to do with the other, but in most cases, they don’t. With my client’s situation, she actually could throw money at the problem – hire someone to free up some time every week specifically designated to family time.
Settling. Something I hear a lot from entrepreneurial clients or prospects is, “I want to make $100,000 in the next 12 months.” When we discuss how they will get there, people start to object: “I can’t possibly charge that much/get that many clients/do all of the things you mentioned…” and then they come up with a lower number. The number isn’t the issue, even though the $100K is totally doable. It is! A dangerous habit for your brain is saying you want something without committing to it. That’s settling. If you want something…WANT IT. Show your brain that wanting equals getting, and you’re not fooling around anymore!
Discomfort with Receiving. Some of us—women especially—get into the habit of making everyone around them comfortable first. And then they/we don’t have energy left to take care of ourselves. Money is energy. If you give all of your energy away without first seeing to your own needs, it will all get used up on other stuff before there is any left for you.
And don’t be surprised if you get FREAKED OUT by putting yourself first. If that happens, that means this is DEFINITELY something you need to work on.
Discomfort with Having. Some people feel uncomfortable having money, so they spend it. Or give it away. I have to admit, I totally don’t get this block…when I see this happening to my clients, I just find ways of hiding money away from their normal checking account.
(BTW – I DO hide money from myself in accounts that are hard to get to, because I find my spending goes down drastically if I have to move money around to make it happen…basically, if I can’t buy something immediately, I lose interest. So there are immediate gratification prevention techniques versus actual, real physical discomfort when you see a lot of money in your checking account.)
Comparison. Whenever you compare your situation to someone else’s, you’re going to be unhappy. What’s more, the comparison makes you feel less than, powerless and messes with your self worth. Fundamentally, when you don’t feel worthy, it messes with your financial worth as well. Remember – never spend money in ways that you believe will make you more “acceptable” in some way…only spend money that makes you happy.
Influence from Others. Your income is an average of the top 5 people you spend the most time with—but I would refine that by saying the top 5 healthiest people you spend time with. Let’s face it, your buddy making $500K annually, but is a total nut job, won’t do much to elevate your mindset. But there are others who make well less than $100K annually who are so freaking Zen, they will make you better. You should spend time with people who elevate you in some way.
Crush those money blocks
Now that you know what money blocks are, let’s release them with these three steps!
#1 Acknowledge/Uncover Your Money Blocks
Once my client spoke about the obstacles to her success, she could finally clear them. Once you verbalize your block and how it personally applies to you, it stops having as much power. Yes – we tend to go back to old patterns, so you’re going to need to continue to address this and be conscious about it!
#2 Get Out of Your Head
Whenever you catch yourself worrying, stop and change your environment; stop engaging. Leave the room, take a few breaths, put on some music. Even if you’re having a money issue, you don’t need to worry over it (I know it’s hard not to). Don’t allow yourself to default-worry whenever you have some down time. And never make a money decision when your head is in a negative place; get yourself back to calm.
When you feel calm, ask yourself: “What would be a word or phrase that better reflects the relationship I want to have with money in this situation?” Write it down and keep it in front of you for a few days, posted on your computer, on a mirror by your chair or any place you’ll see it.
Only when you are calm and clear, should you move forward and take action. Whatever action you decide to take, try something that you might not have done before, which helps you reinforce to yourself that the specific money block you had been struggling with is no longer an issue. Intention is everything.
True, most people tend to work on money blocks for years, but with every step you take, they will become less and less of an obstacle for you. And the sooner you start, the sooner you can eliminate them.