As we close out 2023, more than ever, I hope people understand that financial planning is not about products, or investments, or even about deprivation. It’s not about feeling that you need to “do” something; instead, it’s about getting intentional about your results with money.
Instead of working for your money, start making your money work for you. This isn’t some mysterious, “let’s-produce-passive-income-and-be-part-of-the-club” kind of post. It takes hard work to get to that point. I am talking about YOU. I want you to expect more from your money. That doesn’t mean you need to invest hours and hours figuring this stuff out, it means that you get to change the way you think about your money and what’s important. And in fact, what’s important is probably none of the things you’ve been told are important to a successful financial life.
So, what IS important? I’ve got three things you absolutely must do to expect more from your money (and thereby GET MORE from your money). Because by changing what you expect from your money, by letting go of your traditional expectations, you can change everything.
1. Ground yourself in possibility, not fear
For many people, everything to do with money comes from a place of fear and survival. If that’s you, and you are ready to expect more from your money, then we need to flip that dynamic. So, let’s say that you hate-hate-hate thinking about how you spend money. Or the idea of someone else knowing how you spend your money makes you cringe. Guess what you need to start doing? You need to get more comfortable with looking at the data.
I had a client who resisted this SO MUCH…and all I was asking for was about 15 minutes or so per week. Not much. Finally, I just asked her to log in to Mint every day—don’t even look at it, just log in. That was finally a small enough move that she could deal with it, and it ended up changing everything for her.
When you have clarity, it opens up a world of possibilities for you—it might be changing what you’re doing, or it might be that everything you’re doing is awesome and you can relax. You can have more peace of mind. A huge piece of expecting more from your money is developing your own philosophical framework to filter the data. And the symptoms of fear—judgment, guilt, grudge—have no place in it.
2. No judgment
Have you ever heard of someone getting MORE done and being MORE successful because someone was judging them, or they were judging themselves? Quit judging yourself for where you’re at right now with your money, even if it isn’t where you want to be. (Here’s a secret: it’s never going to be exactly where you want). Where you are is FINE. You have all of the possibilities in the world ahead of you.
I use the example of hopping on the scale. After the holiday season, it SUCKS to get on the scale and see what’s happened. Here’s the thing though – if you get on the scale after avoiding it for one, two or three weeks… or even one, two or three months, the news isn’t good. And then you get mad at yourself for everything you did wrong, and you tell yourself a story about what was bad about how you behaved. Judge, judge, judgety-judgerson.
But that’s useless because “what” the scale is telling you is just a data point. A number. It’s actually BETTER if you weigh yourself every day, because then you have a better sense of cause and effect. And you start to lose the emotion around what the number says, because you start to understand the relationship between your behavior, your goals and the end result. Your money, your spending, your 401k balance is just a number. It’s the story you’re telling yourself about that number — the judgment — that is making you feel bad about it.
Once you’ve started having more than a passing acquaintance with your financial numbers (logging into Mint for five minutes daily, whatever), you need to forgive what has come before now. You can’t move forward with a successful money life until you make peace with your money past. You might have made mistakes, gone into debt, not charged enough for your services, or have given away all of your money, and that’s okay. It got you to where you are today, resolved to get started in a way that suits you better. There’s no empowerment in the past, it’s what you decide right now, and the choice you’re making at this moment.
When we become aware, stop fearing, stop judging and forgive the past, we’re freed up to focus on the things that matter.
3. Get a vision
Most people don’t get excited about money in and of itself… except maybe coin collectors! No, most people need something that they’re going to use that money for—THEN they get excited.
For so many people, personal finance is about saving into your 401k or paying down debt…and that’s sort of boring. Some people get afraid to name their vision, because they are afraid that they’ll have to face up to the idea that they don’t have enough money to get what they really want. But you know what I have discovered? The hardest part is admitting what your vision is. Once you do that, solutions start to present themselves. You’ll see that you have arranged your life to afford exactly what you hope for. OR, you’re in the process of arranging your life for your new goals.
That’s why, during the visioning process, consciousness is key. We can have everything we want in life, but the key is to be completely conscious about what those things are. I find that when my clients detach from what they are “supposed” to want, and really hone in on those unique individual dreams that they have, it’s all doable. Applying consciousness to your money is absolutely key in achieving success in your vision.
I want to challenge you right now to write down one thing. What is one thing you want? What’s one thing that’s fallen by the wayside because life got in the way?
4. Taking action is more important than knowledge or inspiration
The problem with personal finance is, it’s hard to get inspired by it. Sort of like exercise; I have to focus on the feeling after the workout to get inspired to exercise. You have to take action to get the inspiration. Action might be figuring out all of the things involved in getting to your vision, or researching options and what they cost. It might be tracking your spending more closely (millionaires track their spending).
People become overwhelmed because where you are now, and that big vision, seem so far away from each other—but that doesn’t matter. And you might not even know all 27 steps you need to take to get from here to there, and that’s okay. Expecting more from your money isn’t about an elaborately detailed plan from now for the next 5-10-20 years, it’s about awareness and course navigation. You can map the route, but you’re always going to need to adjust and adapt.
And by the way, if you need some help with this, you might want to look into some financial planning! A smaller step would be to sign up for my free resource library, so you can start clarifying your vision. You can find that here.
